Ted Talks: Jill Bolte Taylor: My stroke of insight

I just don’t even know where to start with this one.
I first heard of this video a in 2010, few years after my mom was hit by a car while crossing the street. My mom had/has a traumatic brain injury.
Because the brain is so complex and such little is known about it, the most comparable injury suffered in the brain is a stroke. My sister in law recommended this video, I think she thought ‘this person fully recovered so maybe mom will too’.
For some reason though, it wasn’t until 6 months ago that I finally watched this video, while doing my 200hr TT.
There is so much I find moving about this video, I’m not even sure where to start or how to even explain any of it, or if I should even try!
Our brains are what stop us from finding bliss, nirvana, samadhi and our brains are what deliver us to bliss, nirvana, samadhi. Ummmm…
The more I watch this video, the more I feel the experience of attaining bliss or oneness with the energetic world surrounding us is possible. Then, the minute I stop watching it I think ‘what the heck just happened’.
How can we be so locked into understanding something and then poof – it’s just gone. Do you ever feel like you are just sooooooooo close to an out of reach concept and then poof – it’s gone.?
It’s happened before. I was on the M train, probably not long after I watched this video the first time, I know it was during my TT. I was on the train and for a brief moment or two, as I was looking around the train at the people, wondering where they were going or where they were coming from. I felt it, I felt connected to all of them, I felt like we were all ‘us’. All of us on that train were just energetic forms that form a much bigger energetic force that is the universe. I was so close to having the thought all sorted out, but then my stop came so I was like ‘later samadhi’ and I hopped off. Well, it’s wasn’t quite like that but I did lose the thought pathway to ultimate understand and bliss! I don’t know how – I wasn’t ready I guess. But, I got close, closer than ever before anyway and that’s a good enough sign for me. I’m on the path.

Here’s some music from my homies who know how I feel.
Geto Boys – ‘my minds playin’ tricks on me’


Ardha Chandrasana, what the f***?!

Ardha Chandrasana (half moon pose), I’ve been working on this for a long time – years no, but months yes, and by today’s standards of time – that’s a long one.  Sometimes I nail it without a block, with long straight spine and fingers dangling above the floor and all is well with the world.  But mostly, mostly the toes on the standing foot are squeezing together in a race to the opposite side of the room, my entire standing leg from above my knee to my sits bone is trembling like a cold chihuahua and my out stretched leg is coming at the floor like that crane on 57th steet. What is this?

Screen shot 2014-01-14 at 10.12.09 PM

I mean, is it just tightness in my muscles and joints. Maybe my gluteus medius, minimus, tensor fascia lata or maybe it’s even a tight psoas.  I don’t know what the reason is right now, I am too frustrated to look deeper.  My other consideration is that just possibly its the weight of my thoughts when I come into this pose. Am I dreading it before it starts, thus making my body heavier and harder to move? Have you ever heard of neuropeptides, people?! ‘Neuropeptides – the chemicals triggered by emotions – are thoughts turned into matter.’ (via Anatomy of the Spirit by Caroline Myss PhD, I should also note that I was turned on to this book by goodyoga’s own Desiree Pais) WHAT?!? I’m full up of neuropeptides!  I have also heard that neuropeptides are spoken about in the quantum physics film, ‘What the Bleep Do We Know’, but honestly that movie blew my mind so hard I can only remember the title. Anyway, in this case, maybe the reason I have such trouble with this goddamn pose is my subconscious/completely conscious mind gearing up to fail. And/ or maybe it’s a combo of a tight hip and buttocks girdle (is that a thing? like the shoulder girdle? did I just make up a girdle?) and my neuropeptides freaking the heck out. If only http://jacobkyleyoga.wordpress.com/ was there to support my flailing body every time, where are you when I need you – you beautiful human?! Also, this might help!  Patanjali’s Yoga Sutra 2.33 When these codes of self-regulation or restraint (yamas) and observances or practices of self-training (niyamas) are inhibited from being practiced due to perverse, unwholesome, troublesome, or deviant thoughts, principles in the opposite direction, or contrary thought should be cultivated.
(vitarka badhane pratipaksha bhavanam).  Basically, think opposite thoughts.  This is the worst, this is the best – you get the idea.

Either way, I’m coming for you Ardha Chandrasana and I’m going master you with 6 of my longest breaths…over and over and  over and over again.


That isn’t me, but I know one day, I’ll be rocking that pose too – and hopefully with a bad ass tan and some fucking leg warmers.  Lets do this AC!


Photos courtesy of http://elsieyogakula.wordpress.com/2007/07/ and http://www.myyogaonline.com

Yoga Sutra courtesy of swamij.com

swamij in da house

ps – why hasn’t anyone addressed the fact that is half moon pose is completely different then the half moon pose done in Bikram yoga?  Look it up.

karma yoga?

I came across this article a few days ago and I haven’t stopped thinking about it. Give it a read friends.


The article is from an online gardening forum – urbangardensweb.com.  I signed up for newsletters from UG when I had started my own container garden in the back of my building in 2010, and I still get updates.  Also – I won best Urban Garden about six months ago – but I haven’t had my garden growing since summer 2011, shhhhhh.  They were old pictures and content, I didn’t realize I was still in the running – come on people!

baby gold watermelon sprouting in my garden - 2010

baby gold watermelon sprouting in my garden – 2010

I think the Sustainability in Prisons Project (SPP) is a fantastic program. (read the article)  Aside from the physicality the inmates get while working in the gardens, or sorting the garbage for compost – there is also that much time spent being productive and less time being indoors, where it would be much easier to get involved in some kind of shenanigans. That’s what they call prison drama right, shenanigans? Thought so.

Some of these SPP’s also provide certificates in gardening, which will be super helpful upon their release into the ‘outside’ world and hopefully, seamlessly fitting back into ‘society’.  I doubt that these men and women were in similar working situations before finding themselves in the clink, but it’s possible.   This innovative program is helping them create new lives then they have possibly ever known before, which will hopefully steer them far away from a situation of re-committing a crime.

bg as a teen - 2012

bg as a teen – 2010

All of those benefits are great.  Now think about the pride these men and women feel when they grow something from seed and feed it vitamins and mineral through compost and water it everyday and separate seedlings when needed and then they reach real fruition! JOY!!!  If any of you two or three people reading this have ever gardened you know what I’m talking about.  Such pride – ‘look what I did’!  I haven’t been in prison much – that’s right I said ‘much’ – but I imagine there isn’t a lot of opportunity to feel proud of your behavior or what you are accomplishing.

The other part of this project that is completely amazing is that the food being produced is either going directly back into the kitchen of the prison or it goes to a food bank!  Food bank – these men and women, these prisoners are voluntarily helping those LESS fortunate then themselves, less fortunate than being able to live in a prison. Holy heck – mind blown!  Imagine the spiritual energy that goes into this food, that is then taken in by other who really need it. Is that to deep? No, it’s not. How many of us can say we do the same to help others? These men and women are growing healthy organic foods for not just themselves but for the masses!  This is an ‘us’ ‘we’ project people, not a ‘me’ ‘I’ thing.  A project for the greater good of mankind and for the earth. Pretty great stuff. Karma yoga y’all. Right?

mother pride

mother pride

more mother pride

more mother pride

I included some pics of my award-winning garden in case you were wondering, I’m sure you were.

Peace – Meg



happiness comes in many forms and means different things to everyone. i think i’m sure i would be happy in this muddy water hole too.
having baby bubble back fuzzy head there with me would be radical.